The Real You

EP 11: Unlocking Success: Raeanne Lacatena on Shifting Perspectives, Writing, and Balancing Energies

David Young | Raeanne Lacatena Episode 11

Episode Description: Are you ready to unlock the secrets to authentic business and personal development success? Join David Young as he interviews Raeanne LaCatena, a business coach and author, about her transformative book writing journey and embracing your true self.

Key Questions Explored in the Episode:

  • What inspired Raeanne LaCatena to co-author 'Cracking the Rich Code' and write 'The Integrated Entrepreneur'?
  • How can mental health and personal development be integrated into business coaching?
  • What roles do masculine and feminine energy play in business?
  • What are the key strategies for running a successful business on LinkedIn?
  • How can viewing sales as a service shift your business mindset?
  • What does it mean to wear masks, and how can you journey towards being your truest self?

Discussion Points:

  • Raeanne's book writing journey and experiences co-authoring 'Cracking the Rich Code.'
  • The integration of mental health and personal development in business coaching.
  • Understanding and balancing masculine and feminine energy in business.
  • The transformative power of LinkedIn in building relationships and business opportunities.
  • The mindset shift of viewing sales as a service.
  • Setting boundaries and agreements to balance personal and professional responsibilities.
  • The concept of wearing masks and the journey towards authenticity.

Summary of the Conversation: In this episode, we delve into Raeanne's journey as an author and business coach. Raeanne shares her experiences co-authoring 'Cracking the Rich Code' and writing 'The Integrated Entrepreneur.' They discuss the critical role of integrating mental health and personal development into business coaching and explore the dynamic of masculine and feminine energy in business. The conversation also touches on viewing sales as a service, setting boundaries, and the importance of authenticity in both personal and professional life.

About Raeanne: Raeanne is a business coach and author renowned for her expertise in integrating mental health and personal development into business strategies. She has co-authored 'Cracking the Rich Code' and penned 'The Integrated Entrepreneur,' sharing her insights on authenticity and purposeful living. Raeanne is passionate about helping others achieve their highest potential through genuine connections and mindful business practices.

Key Takeaways:

  1. Integrating mental health and personal development into business coaching can lead to more holistic success.
  2. Balancing masculine and feminine energy is crucial for effective business management.
  3. Viewing sales as a service can transform your business mindset and approach.
  4. Setting clear boundaries and agreements helps balance personal and professional responsibilities.

Time Stamps:

  • [00:00] Introduction and welcome
  • [02:30] Raeanne's journey to co-authoring 'Cracking the Rich Code'
  • [08:15] Writing 'The Integrated Entrepreneur'
  • [15:00] The role of mental health in business coaching
  • [22:45] Masculine and feminine energy in business
  • [30:20] The power of LinkedIn in building relationships
  • [38:10] Strategies for running a business on LinkedIn
  • [45:00] Viewing sales as a service
  • [50:25] Setting boundaries and balancing responsibilities
  • [55:40] Wearing masks and the journey to authenticity
  • [01:00:00] Closing thoughts and takeaways

Links: Connect with Raeanne LaCatena on LinkedIn: Raeanne's LinkedIn Profile Visit Raeanne website: Raeanne's Website

Connect with Raeanne on LinkedIn and explore her insights on authentic success!

 

 

Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Real you Podcast. I'm your host, david Young, and this is episode number 11. This podcast discusses tapping into your full potential and finding ways to be the truest version of yourself. Today, I'm joined by Raeann Lacatina, a business coach, former mental health professional and now published author. We will discuss her coaching, book writing, being your true self and a whole lot more. Raeann, it's so great you've taken the time to join me today. It's just a pleasure to have you on the show.

Speaker 2:

Thank you for having me, David.

Speaker 1:

Oh, absolutely so. I don't even. I've had so much to ask and so much ground we could cover. I don't even know where to get started. So I think we'll just jump right into the books, because I think that's very exciting and it's a relatively new adventure for you. So talk about Cracking the Rich Code and kind of how that got started and your part in that, and then we'll move into book number two.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely yeah. So you and I met on LinkedIn, and that's actually how Cracking the Rich Code happened. In my life as well. I have been posting on LinkedIn for a number of years now and really building a network and getting connected with more and more people, and one of the folks that reached out to me was Jim Britt, who is Tony Robbins' former coach and works closely with Tony Robbins on this co-authored book called Cracking the Rich Code.

Speaker 2:

It's now approaching its 13th edition, and basically Jim's goal is to bring a bunch of authors together, a bunch of thought leaders, coaches, business owners doesn't really matter their profession, but he's been bringing them together for years to share their thoughts on the different ways to live a fulfilling, happy, healthy, wealthy life, and Jim reached out to me. We had a really great conversation. He heard about what I was writing about in my book that's coming out this year soon, and he said that the framework that I was teaching in the book was something that the world needed to hear, and so he invited me to be one of the co-authors of the Cracking the Rich Code 12th edition. It's come out, it's since become an international bestseller and it's been an incredible experience so far.

Speaker 1:

Wow, that's amazing. I do have the book. I'm sad to say that I have not read your chapter yet. I meant to get to it, but life is a little bit crazy at the moment, so I apologize for not reading it, but I will get to it and I do have it. So how long from the time you met Jim to then, how much time did you have to write like your section and like what was that process like?

Speaker 2:

It was a few months that I had. I had already, as I mentioned so, the book that I was working on already. I started writing that book in March of 20. And so I was well into crafting my thoughts about the framework that's called steer, clear and anchor, which is what I go over in the book, and it's really a framework on how to shift your perspective in any given circumstance, whether it's life or business, and really help you to overcome obstacles by using a self-coaching tool that I've developed over my 20 years in personal development. And so I had already kind of pulled together a lot of the thoughts and ideas, and Jim was well in pulling together the 20 authors that were in this edition. So I had about maybe four months to write the chapter, but in the scope of now the process of writing a full length book, that was a minor ask compared to the huge.

Speaker 1:

It's like walking around the block.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, pretty much. It was a good way to run before I walk or walk before I run. There it is. So that I could really get a taste for what it was like to go through this process, because book writing is a completely different animal than I have ever been exposed to. I did not know what I was getting myself into it and you're like, oh my God, this was big.

Speaker 1:

This was a big, big adventure that I have embarked on.

Speaker 2:

It is.

Speaker 1:

So talk a little bit, then, about the book that you're writing. That's yours, the whole thing. Started writing it March of 2022, but I'm sure you started thinking about it well before then.

Speaker 2:

So talk a little bit about your thought in terms of wanting to write the book and then kind of what the book is about. Yeah, sure, I often say and actually wrote about in the book that I never really saw myself as an author. It wasn't a part of the plan, it wasn't one of those things where some people know that they're meant to be an author. They know that this is something that they want to do. It was kind of the opposite for me where I actually didn't see myself as someone who was an author. I didn't see myself as someone who was an author, I didn't see myself as someone who was good at writing and everyone was telling me you should write a book, you should write a book, you should write a book. Coaches that I've worked with in the past people friends, family, clients that I've served over the years said I had a lot to say and a lot to share and they thought that I should write a book. And so finally I was like, okay, all right, I'll write the book. And I started to write it and it snowballed into something completely different than I was expecting. So the book is called the Integrated Entrepreneur Actualize your Potential and Fulfill your Purpose and really the premise of the book is that really my teaching and the things that I do with my clients as a holistic business coach, is that I believe that business is a brilliantly disguised personal development plan and that some people come into it for the money, for the financial freedom, for the flexibility, but they really start to see themselves in different ways and see their weaknesses and their strengths and they see the places that their mindset fails them. They see the places that some of their growth needs to happen for lack of a better way to say it through the business, and so this book is really way more than I expected it to be.

Speaker 2:

There are client stories in there that I share of different experiences that I've witnessed in the business owners I've served in my career.

Speaker 2:

I share a ton of my own story, which I wasn't expecting to do, so I'm sort of the primary case study in the book where I'm sharing a lot of the different things that I've been through, both personally and professionally, that have taught me key lessons to help me become a successful entrepreneur, and so I share the different stories that my clients have been through and I've been through to help illustrate those different principles, and at the end of each chapter and throughout the book I share very concrete, actionable tools that people can do to help them to become an integrated entrepreneur where they are respectful of the fact that who they are anywhere is who they are everywhere, and that it's not just tactics, strategies, numbers, revenue in business which is important. We have to pay attention. There's also this internal mindset component that is so critically important to the success of the business owner our energy, our thoughts, our emotions, and how do we steward those different parts of ourselves internally to create an external success?

Speaker 1:

No, that's amazing. I think I have 15 follow-up questions from that.

Speaker 2:

I don't know if I took enough notes.

Speaker 1:

No that's amazing, gosh. I don't know where to start with that, so. But first, one of the things that jumped out was I've seen, when people are writing books, obviously a lot of different ways to do it. So, in terms of your process, did you carve out like I'm going to write for X amount of time per week or day, or I'm going to try to get a chapter done over X time, or did you just kind of write when you could, because obviously you're very busy? You have three kids also running your business, so it's not like you're not just sitting on a ton of free time. So I'm sure you had to really think about how you're organizing your time and then being able to focus and be fresh to write. How did you set that up and what was your goal in terms of trying to write?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I did a little bit of the trial and error. At first March of 2022, I had a big pop where I wrote a whole bunch maybe like 50 pages right in the beginning, and then I didn't look at it again for months and months. It was brewing and it was sorting itself out in my brain, but I didn't actually sit down to write and I was telling myself that because same things that you had just mentioned the three kids, the business owners, the business that I take care of myself as well that that was my priority and that it would make sense that this would fall in a secondary position and that I really just needed to get away. That's the first process that I went through. I need to get away, I need to just be able to focus on it for a couple of days and I'll get a lot done. I gave myself that gift, went away and wrote again about another 50 pages and then didn't touch it again for another few months, and then I decided that something needed to change in order for me to get this done and I created a ritual for myself around writing, and that was one of the most transformative things that I've done for myself, not just in the process of writing the book, but also just personally in my own personal development.

Speaker 2:

Because I had this resistance and seeing myself as a writer, I needed to go into the process of doing this daily. And so every single day, at the same time, for the most part, every single day, seven days a week, as a mom, as a business owner, I would start my day writing the book and I would sometimes I'd have ideas prepared that I could pull from and write on. Sometimes it was just brainstorming, sometimes it was evolving a story or extrapolating more from the story, sometimes it was really revisiting what I had written already. But I always created a ritual for myself where I would start with what are some ways that I can inspire creativity? What are some ideas that I want to be working on? I have this candle that my husband gave me that says smells like she's writing a bestseller.

Speaker 2:

So, I would have these different things that I would do for myself Listen to high vibration frequencies, listen to some music, take a walk, whatever I needed to do to inspire creative action and commit to that hour daily. And then I got through the book at a pretty rapid rate and was able to get to eventually the deadline and engage the publisher in the way that I did.

Speaker 1:

Nice. That's amazing. I like how it started. It kind of evolved right, which is really kind of a nice metaphor for kind of life and business. Right, you started out one way, took some breaks, did it again, took some breaks, then realized like, okay, that's not sustainable or it's going to take too long, now I need the daily habit, which is really, really cool. So when you started to write it and you said, okay, now I'm going to do the book, were, when you started to write it and you said, okay, now I'm going to do the book, were you planning on doing the mix? I know you said your story coming out was a little bit surprising. So was the goal really to write just about your coaching experience and then, as you were writing, it turned into more like your story coming out or was it just kind of? That's just how it happened, kind of organically?

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So when I spoke to Jim Britt during the process of being invited into Cracking the Rich Code, the idea of the book was really just very simply steer. Clear and anchor is my framework. Steer is an acronym S-T-E-A-R. Chapter one is the S situation, chapter two is the thoughts.

Speaker 2:

This is the next chapter, so it was very wrote through the framework, no-transcript my own introverted self, bringing myself into the story, but then also having really deep conversations with my clients and asking their permission, knowing that I was coming from this mission-driven place of service, and every single person who I asked if they were comfortable with me writing about them in the book, keeping their names protected. In most instances they were like yes, let's go. If this is going to help more people, if bringing your work to the world is going to make a difference in the world and I can help in any way by sharing my story, then absolutely share my story. And so it was this really beautiful surprise. I learned more about myself. People who've read it so far learned more about me, and being able to show the work in real time with real people was really a helpful process show the work in real time with real people was really a helpful process.

Speaker 1:

No, that's really amazing. So then, as you kind of leaned into that and I assume you just kind of embraced the fact that that was just going to become a major part of the book, adding your story and your experiences to really integrate the lessons and the teachings, yes, yeah, that's exactly right, love it.

Speaker 1:

So talk a little bit about, like, your time in mental health and then you transition to the business coaching and I know, because we've talked a couple of times in the past, how you've really leaned on, like your experience in the mental health space, which has really become almost like a foundation for your business coaching, because you are integrating mental and physical health. It's not just running a business, like you said, it's not just the X's and O's of revenue and marketing. So talk a little bit about just kind of what you learned in that time in the mental health space and then how that's really helped you going forward.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean, we only have so much time here to be able to talk about that.

Speaker 2:

It really is, it said simply, the foundation of all of who I am and all that I do Very logistically. For example, I some of these modalities that are evidence-based, that I'm able to call on in service to my clients, that other business coaches aren't able to do. And so, just from a practice standpoint, a lot of what I learned and a lot of what I've become certified in applies to business owners, because it turns out that business owners are human beings too and they have struggles and pain and anxiety and depression. And all of these things that I've learned become a part of the tool chest that I use in service to the clients that I serve, just logistically. But then also the experiences that I've had in the process of being in the mental health world makes me very protective of the mental health experience of the business owner, because it can be a roller coaster to be a business owner and we are living our lives at that same time as building our business. And so all of the things that I learned along the way around not just managing anxiety and depression or grief or loss they always come into play in the in the clients that I serve. I tell, I tell my people that nothing is off the table in our coaching sessions If, if something is going on for you, I believe it's affecting your business one way or another. It's not that we focus only on the internal world in our, in our coaching, but it's. It's not ignored. There's a seat at the table for emotion. There's a seat at the table for self-care, for wellness, for physical health, for mental health, for spiritual health, whatever it is that you're going through relationally, financially, emotionally we can talk through in this integrated, holistic way because it's affecting you and you know I mean that's just the beginning of the iceberg. I also learned from the clients that I served. I think I've mentioned to you in the past.

Speaker 2:

I started in pediatric palliative care and so early, early in my career, I learned a lot of the hard, hard lessons that some people never even want to think about, by witnessing some of the things that I've experienced in mental health.

Speaker 2:

Mental health, a closeness to a lot of pain. That, for me personally, taught me so much about myself and about the world and about life and about urgency, which is something that I value in the clients that I serve now. I value people who understand that life is not guaranteed and that tomorrow is not a promise. And why not live our purpose and our mission to the fullest now, because we don't know if we're going to be able to turn left or right, let alone be able to fulfill everything that we wanted to fulfill in life. And so the people that I really love to work with are the ones that they have that commitment, they have that urgency, they have that connection to what it is they want to become and who they are and who they want to be in the world. And I learned that from witnessing very difficult things and helping walk people through and guide them and usher them through a lot of pain in the process of being in that world. No, I love that.

Speaker 1:

And, like you said, you started kind of at the probably one of the most difficult like areas, right. So you got to see that you know up close, which then kind of shaped the way you think, because we do get caught up in the planning ahead, looking ahead you know whatever down the road, and then there's no guarantee we're going to get there. So it's good to keep that like in mind, but let's not make that your primary focus. As someone who's suffered from anxiety and depression for a long time, I've seen a therapist pretty consistently for at least the last decade. The mental health part really speaks to me because I understand its importance. I don't know where I would be without all my time with all my therapists and I was just talking to my current therapist, who I love, recently.

Speaker 1:

So when I left my nine to five in mid-February, my thought was you know, I'm releasing this emotional baggage of this nine to five job that I'm not very good at, that I don't like, that I don't want to do, and I'm embracing this kind of entrepreneurial journey which I really do like and I'm excited about. And so I thought the scale was going to really tip a little bit my way, like I was getting rid of this and I was doing this. What I underestimated was, once this went away, it was not the clean break All of a sudden, it was just a different. So yes, I did get rid of that, but I added all of the emotional, like when you're trying to do it yourself and now suddenly you're responsible for everything. You're carrying it differently than you do as an employee and I think I underestimated that carry. So I'm curious to get your take on that, because you've lived it and you've seen it a lot with your experience.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and sometimes people will come to me for that same transition where they've decided that they want to step into the entrepreneurial world or leaving their corporate space.

Speaker 2:

And there is that honeymoon period, for sure, where you do feel a weight lifted, you feel relieved, you feel you feel excited about the future and the promise.

Speaker 2:

Except you stayed in the employee world for a lot of reasons and even though it was probably a false sense of security that paycheck every single week, that consistency that that if you do this list of things you're going to get paid goes away when you become an entrepreneur.

Speaker 2:

And so, even though we're creating more freedom and flexibility in our life, we're also taking on more risk and responsibility as an entrepreneur and for someone who experiences anxiety or depression as a baseline or as a part of their, a lot of pressure and and it is definitely a mindset shift for people to go through to move from the false security of employment and I say false because we all see how many layoffs are happening all of the time, and it's nice to think that we're safe and and and cozy in our employee world, but it's not always guaranteed either, and so we have to do a renegotiation with our mindset when we step into the entrepreneurial space, especially coming from the employee mindset and that happens no matter whether you come from that space or not that there's a new risk assumption that comes from being in it.

Speaker 2:

You have to have a risk assumption to be successful, and that requires a newfound confidence, a newfound certainty in yourself. And that's why I focus on the internal world so heavily, because if you don't renegotiate that mindset internally, then you're going to keep making decisions that are in alignment with thoughts that are going to produce anxious results, and that's not what you want in an entrepreneurial experience whatsoever.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's operating from that place of fear and like what can go wrong instead of abundance and what can go right. Her point was that it took you know, I was in the corporate world for over 20 years, so she was like you know. It's going to take quite a while for that experience. Just the frustration and the burnout and just the friction you experience for over two decades will not just magically disappear now that you're on this new path. That's still with you. It's still part of you. You were programmed a certain way for a really long time and so you have to have a lot of patience and grace with yourself, because it will take a while for your brain and your body to adjust to this new schedule, this new way of working, this new way of existing, this new way of generating income. Everything you're doing is completely different than anything that you've done before, so it's almost like a shock to the system. So she was like you know just be calm and patient for a while, because it really is going to take a while.

Speaker 2:

You don't need 20 years, though, right. Like 20 years to build that foundation and to have those habits and to have those experiences. But it doesn't take 20 years of iterations of repetition to replace it. That you know. Thank goodness for neuroplasticity. The brain is malleable. It does change, it does shift and it happens. There's a lot going in there with that reprogramming that you're doing by for yourself, by stepping into this experience.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, if I, if it took 20 years, I would quit now because I don't have it.

Speaker 2:

I mean, as long as you're an entrepreneur, you're going to have to be shifting and changing, and that's part of the point, is that. But it doesn't have to be this unlearning of the old every single time.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, no for sure, yeah. So I love the background and I love how you bring it. I love how you bring it with you the therapy part, the mental health part into the business because it is, like you said, it's very aligned, especially with your decision making and kind of how you're acting. So I love that you do that. It's really I think it's very critical and, like you said, I don't think there's a lot. Well, a lot of people aren't trained that way, so they can't. But even if they have some background or whatever, it's just not really kind of part of what they're doing. It's much more tactical and marketing and content and sales and those things are all important. But if your mind's not in the right spot and your body's not, if everything's not in alignment first, then it really doesn't matter how good your content and marketing are, because something's missing. That can't really tie that in. So I love that you do that.

Speaker 2:

Well, thank you. Yeah, that's that masculine and feminine blend that I talk about a lot. It's a part of it. It's the feminine side of things, and the masculine side of things is very important in business. We do need the numbers, the revenue, the tactics, the strategy, the marketing. That's an important part of business. That's all the masculine side of things. The momentum, the drive, the competition, those are all important elements of business. But if we don't pay attention to the feminine side of things as well, that's where I see stuff start to fall off the rails. This is collaboration, communication, this is connections, this is relationship building, this is nurturing, having empathy and compassion for your clients, for your team, for the people that you serve. Those are all really important ingredients for a successful business owner, and so integrating both of those worlds is a part of the process too.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, in fact I'm glad you brought that up. I think that was the first time when we had the call, or I can't think of if it was a call or you might. I think you did a call, you did a joint call with someone that I was like listening in on and you guys were talking about masculine and feminine energy. I think I think that was the first time I had ever heard that and I think we talked again.

Speaker 2:

That's right. Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 1:

We talked again about it and I was like I didn't even really know, I didn't even understand it. I was just like masculine energy, feminine energy. It was like a new concept for me. Then, of course, I started to see and hear it much more, but that was the first time when I came across, when you were doing it back last fall, and I think you even told me like I had I had too much masculine like energy in my kind of thoughts and like business, and it was like I'm trying to remember it was like a lot of like pushing energy versus pulling or pulling versus pushing. And there was this whole other side, which is what you're talking about, like relationships, networking, creativity, empathy, like all this whole other part that really needed to be blended with the execution, because I'm a big like execution person logical, analytical data, which is fine, but I sometimes miss, like the other part. So I think that's really cool and that was a really cool concept that you kind of helped me or exposed me to, you know, early on.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and it doesn't need to be a 50-50 split for you to be successful, but to have it completely absent from your life. That's going to impact your relationships, it's going to impact your business, it's going to impact your success. Or there's also this spectrum of there are distorted ways to show up in these energies too. There's a difference between competition and aggressive push force, wildly competitive energy on the heavily distorted masculine side and on the feminine side it can be the martyrdom or the gossip, the blaming, the victimhood. Neither of those types of energies work in business either or in life. It turns out Again just a metaphor. And so you know, looking at not just what's the balance of the two, or the harmony, I like to say, of both of those energies, but also where are you showing up on the other ends of the spectrum, where you might be a little bit more distorted in your presentation of your energy, to have an honest conversation with yourself and be aware of how you're affecting other people.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, for sure. No, I love that and I think it's great for, like you said, not even just business owners, but for anyone, no matter what you're doing, to kind of be cognizant of you know both sides of that coin and not being too far. You know one way or one way or the other.

Speaker 2:

You took the quiz, didn't you, david? Yeah, so there is a quiz that people can take If anyone is listening and they're interested. I developed a quiz that can tell you which end of the spectrum you're on in the masculine and feminine distorted energy, and you can just go to my website, rayannlacatinacom. Slash energy quiz and find out how you are showing up in your energy in your life and business.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm a sucker for any quiz. I'll take any Quizzes are fun.

Speaker 1:

I'll take any quiz If it's related to personality development, fun. I'll take any quiz If it's related to personality development, business. Whatever I'll take it, I say yes, I'm fascinated by all of that stuff. So let's talk a little bit, switch gears a little bit, and you mentioned LinkedIn at the beginning, which is how we got connected and obviously the book kind of came to be, or at least the second, the current book. How long have you been active on LinkedIn and can you talk about the relationships you build and kind of what it's done with the power of the platform?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely so I started on LinkedIn. I've been on LinkedIn I don't even know how many years decades probably at this point. But I only really committed to the process of engaging on LinkedIn since I opened my own business about three and a half years ago and it started out the same way kind of scattershot, a little bit, a little fearful, hiding behind the scenes, doing lots of very surface level posts and it actually became the impetus of me learning how to write is because I decided and committed to writing daily on LinkedIn and building a network, and I wrote a post the other day actually, and I mean it when I say that LinkedIn has literally changed my life. It really has. I'm so grateful that I overcame the limiting beliefs that I had about social media in order to show up more consistently on LinkedIn, because it has brought some of the most amazing people and opportunities and connections into my world that I would not have otherwise had the opportunity to connect with. Just like proximity wise, I now have friends in Dubai and London and Mexico and all over the world. My coach is in South Africa. It's just incredible how people are joined together from around the world as a starting point. Then also some amazing people doing some amazing things.

Speaker 2:

When I first was on LinkedIn, my profile was very heavily one particular type of let's do our resume updates kind of LinkedIn users, and so I found it kind of boring and kind of stuffy. I was like I don't really, how is LinkedIn going to help me if it's just a bunch of resume updates? Then, when I started to expand my network and see who else was out there, there's incredible people doing incredible things on this platform, and so I am really grateful that I took the leap and, even though it's still uncomfortable at times, being able to show more of who I am and connect with more people has been such a gift that I've given to myself and my business, because it's helped me grow my business too frankly, sure, no, yeah, I just kind of want to retweet what you just said.

Speaker 1:

I mean it's changed my life as well. Again, connections all over the world I don't know how many calls I've had now with people all over and it's energizing and smart, talented, high achieving, ambitious, creative, just like all these terrific things and just seem like good people that you just want to spend time with and talk with. And I learned so much and it just makes me feel better, kind of about the human experience.

Speaker 1:

When I get off the calls I'm like all right, like this, I feel, I feel good, like there's a lot of negative, a lot of negative in the, in the news, if you want it, and this is like positive, and so I try to use that, you know to, to help balance. Um, the what's funny is so, before I started posting, I would actually go probably six or eight weeks without even logging into LinkedIn because my feed was nothing but job promotions and new jobs. Right, because it was because I wasn't engaging, it was just my connections. And then it was their updates and then they weren't really posting or engaging either, other than like hey, I got a new, better job, promotion, or I got a new, better job, different company. So I would be sitting there like, well, I don't like my job, I want a promotion or a better, new, better job. Like like I don't want to log in and just see about like all this stuff. Right, like I had this.

Speaker 1:

Really it was a really bad like mindset. It was not I should, it shouldn't, it didn't affect me at all. Right, it's not a zero sum game, like it was completely independent. But I would see it and then start to feel like, oh well, I'm not doing enough. And so, like you said, like once you get on and start engaging, like you control the feed.

Speaker 1:

So once you're you're, you're curating your own feed. So if you don't like what you're seeing, so if it's you know resumes or job promotions like you don't have to do that, like you can find other people that are talking about you know interesting things that you're interested in, and then that's what you'll start to see and you start engaging with that and then that kind of becomes your new feed. So, yeah, I love that. It's an amazing platform. I've only been on it for 10 months actively and I would say the same thing Whether I can make the business work or not, it's still changed my life in terms of people I've met and starting the podcast and all these things. So if anybody out, there is listening.

Speaker 1:

That's considering doing it. I couldn't recommend it more.

Speaker 2:

We'll cancel that thought, though, David. The business is working right.

Speaker 1:

I'm just saying there's no guarantees. Can someone?

Speaker 2:

let her get away with that. Well, yeah.

Speaker 1:

We have to be realistic. Like it's not a guarantee, like.

Speaker 1:

I think that it will and whatever. But if, for whatever reason, it doesn't like, it won't be a failure because I tried and it still enriched my life in like all these other ways, so it's, it's a win, like regardless. And again, if you're out there you're like, well, I don't want to start a business, that's fine. Most people don't still like. Growing your network can't hurt because you'd like you said, the layoffs like it doesn't. You could be super happy today, career dream job, that's great and hopefully it stays for as long as you want it, but it could go away tomorrow. So, having a bigger network and people that know who you are and the way you think and write and your talents, that can never hurt. So even if you're again you don't want to start a business, that's perfect.

Speaker 1:

Just once a week, it doesn't matter. Just start sharing thoughts and stories because, like you said, writing is thinking. I was just talking to a guy yesterday about that and you know the AI is kind of changing that. So if we stop writing, do we stop thinking? So just putting your thoughts out there is just good. It's good for you and it's good for you know, whoever can you know can come across it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and LinkedIn is a relationship platform. So even if you don't want to build a personal brand, you aren't looking for a new job and you don't want to build a personal brand, you aren't looking for a new job and you don't want to build a business. If you like amazing people doing amazing things and you like to connect with them, that is another reason that LinkedIn has been incredibly helpful for me too. It's just from a relationship standpoint.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, exactly, and I mean people are not going to find you. Like you said, you had a LinkedIn profile for like a really long time, but if you're not active on it, you're not just going to show up, you just don't magically appear in people's feeds. If you're not putting yourself out there, and yeah, recruiters can find you and do searches and stuff, and I mean you will show up in some searches, but in terms of like you're talking about, like building relationships and connections, it's hard to do if you're just sitting on the sideline, right? What advice would you give in terms of if you are running a business on LinkedIn, in terms of content or strategies, or how do you go about balancing the personal stories, the growth type content and then also like, hey, this is my business and this is how I can help you.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah. There's so much that I can say about that. The first piece I'll say is from an advice standpoint, is that anything new starts out feeling a little uncomfortable, but the more you do it, the less it's a problem. A couple of years ago I did my first podcast and I was completely stressed out and anxious on the first one. Now this is just another conversation. I feel zero stress, zero anxiety, and it's just another conversation. I feel zero stress, zero anxiety, and it's just another thing that I do is I speak on podcasts. It's not a problem anymore. Same thing with LinkedIn. I remember the first day that I wrote like a Memorial Day post, like happy Memorial Day, and it was just a flag and it was just that's all I wrote. And I was sitting there, my heart was racing, I was so nervous to post something by myself and see how it went, and I can't believe how much stress I gave that silly little American flag post.

Speaker 2:

And now I'm putting like my heart and soul into posts and that's really what I'll say is you know, if you want, if you want strategy and tactics, david's your guy, right, he's the guy he knows the engagement and I can talk a lot about it too, because I have learned a lot from a lot of the greats on LinkedIn about different ways to work, the algorithm and engagement and ways of being. The piece that nobody's talking about that I can contribute to is that you want to be authentically you and you want to tap into your highest mission and purpose in the post in the process of doing that. So don't necessarily if your strategy is post just for the sake of posting, just to get another post out there to keep up with the consistency, to keep up with the algorithm, you're going to lose people and you're not going to find the ones that you really want to find and you're going to get lost in the mix of just a bunch of generic posts. But if you take a second and tap into what you're really looking to accomplish and who you really want to serve, and even calling in your highest best self for that post before you go into writing the content or making the graphic, and you come from that side of yourself, it's going to go so much better for you instead of just posting for the sake of posting.

Speaker 2:

There's a moment I would be lying to you if I said I didn't sometimes just write a post for the sake of posting, the more often that you can incorporate into your strategy. Literally yesterday, I did an entire breathwork session because I was feeling overwhelmed for a variety of reasons and I could not think of anything to write and I was feeling stressed out about it. So I decided to lean into taking care of myself, go into an hour-long breathwork session for myself and meditation, and the post came through. If I'm overwhelmed as a business owner today, others are overwhelmed as a business owner today. How can I give back to the overwhelmed business owner? And then I had a really great engaging post with people and so I just encourage you.

Speaker 1:

That was the havening correct.

Speaker 2:

That was right, yeah, yeah, I did a little of that for myself and I was like you know, I've never taught anybody this before on LinkedIn. Anyway, I have people that all the time in my coaching calls and so I just I shared that from a place of being authentically me and striving to be my higher self instead of letting the lower self take over. You know I can, if you want me to, I can speak to more strategy on things. But really, book a call with David, he'll help.

Speaker 1:

My new, that is my new thing.

Speaker 2:

I see that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's been. It's been an interesting switch, so one of the things we've talked about. And yeah, it's been an interesting switch, so one of the things we've talked about, and I referenced it in a comment the other day. I learned this from you because selling obviously, when we are trying to run a business, there is an element of sales which, for whatever reason, is very uncomfortable for most people and I don't know what that is in our DNA, but I think most people.

Speaker 1:

When you're trying to sell yourself, your product or your service, it just feels a little bit awkward, at least at the beginning. Asking for business, asking people to invest in you, giving whatever you're selling and talking about it. There's a little bit of awkwardness there that I'm feeling currently. And you have talked about switching the reframing and thinking of sales as a service. So, yes, you are selling, but you're really providing value and service to the potential client and there is an exchange of currency for that, which is part of it, but thinking of it in terms of like. But I'm adding this value, I'm providing this service, I'm helping them in X, Y and Z ways.

Speaker 2:

So talk about that reframe, because I think it's really important again, especially for people that are newer to selling themselves and their business. Yeah Well, sales is an entry point to, service is really the reframe, and you aren't selling yourself, you're selling the value that you can create in relationship to somebody else.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And if you want to engage in that energy exchange, which is I create value for someone and they exchange with currency, then you have to have the sales conversation. This is a perfect example of what we were talking about earlier in the book, and I go into it in the book as well, in Integrated Entrepreneur, because this is a mindset issue. This is not a of course we need to. Let's start with the tactical side of things, the masculine side of things. You do need, when you're crafting your offer, as a salesperson or a person who is engaging in offering a service or a product, you do need to do market research, you do need to look at competitors, you do need to make sure that your offer is reasonably priced and you do need to have your offer match the value that your client is going to receive in return. So if you're going to charge $25,000 for coaching, what is the potential return on investment that the business owner can receive in exchange for that revenue? There needs to be some kind of reasonable match in the logistics of the exchange to begin and that's the masculine side of things the feminine side is all the drama that you bring to the table about the interactions with the energy, the thoughts, the emotions that you have around sales, and so it's, and maybe maybe it's in our DNA. I don't have any scientific proof of that. The reality is that the way that it's in our DNA is that we've had, as human beings, some kind of negative interaction with a salesperson or a sales experience We've maybe felt sold to or pushed. That's where the sleazy used car salesman mentality comes from. Someone who has difficulty with sales more than likely had some kind of experience in their own personal life where they felt yucky with that salesperson and they're rejecting that feeling and therefore rejecting sales. They're throwing the baby out with the bathwater, as it were, and saying I don't want other people to feel this way because I felt yucky with that one particular sales experience, and so I'm going to lump all sales experiences into that way of being. When really people can feel empowered by a sale, when you come from this place of confidence and connection and relationship and energy exchange there it is exchange. When you're coming from a place of service, people feel good about exchanging revenue. They don't feel bad about it, and who are you to say that it is a yucky experience for the other person? That's their choice, because value lives in the mind of the client and so really connecting with them about what they're looking to accomplish, how you can serve them, making sure that your service matches their goals. That is a way to avoid being salesy as well.

Speaker 2:

You don't sell somebody something just for the sake of selling something. People will tell me when they're on a sales call with me we'll call it a sales call. They'll say I really appreciate that you actually shared with me that I'm not a good fit for you, or that there's somebody else who might serve you better. Because if I'm coming from an authentic place of service in that sales conversation, then why wouldn't I send them to somebody who would serve them better for their goals? And so you're paying attention to their authentic needs, their authentic problems. You're listening instead of just trying to prove your worth or speak for the sake of speaking, and you're finding out how you can create a difference in their life. And if you can make the offer, make the invitation, if you can't, who can you connect them to? If you're truly there for service, who can serve them better?

Speaker 1:

No, I love that. I think it's a great reframe. It's a great, like you said, mindset to come from. I think it takes the pressure off of the sales and just not even thinking about that part of it. That's just a natural progression and transaction at the end, if it can refer them to. So it's just another avenue for why it's important to build the network.

Speaker 2:

And they remember that too. Just like when a friend comes into town and says, hey, buddy, I want to take my wife out to dinner. Where should I take her? What's the best restaurant in town? You tell them they have a great experience.

Speaker 2:

They remember David was the one who created that good experience for you, and so maybe they're not a right fit for you right now, but you're going to need sales in 2029 too. And so if someone else can get them where you need them to work with them, send them, give them a good care, give them a good experience in the moment, and if they're ever a right fit for you, they'll either refer to you themselves or someone else. And so when we release the attachment to the money, which is the other part of the sale, when you come in it seeing dollar signs or focusing on the revenue, you're coming in it for the revenue and they're going to feel sleazy salesman's feelings, commission breath. But if you come from it, from this, suspending the need for the revenue and truly trusting that what your value you bring to the table is worthwhile, then you're going to be far more successful in that experience of the sales conversation.

Speaker 1:

No, I love that. Suspending the need for the money Hard to do, I think, especially either when you're starting out or if you're struggling and then you're like, oh, I need the money. I think that's a barrier that you have to really psychologically prep for, to understand that that is secondary and it is more about the service and the value, even though you need the money. So I think that is a challenge.

Speaker 2:

It's a challenge it is, you can get in some certain scenarios where that becomes more difficult.

Speaker 1:

Yeah for sure, and that's the whole point of the internal work. First you got to put the and getting some certain scenarios where that becomes more difficult.

Speaker 2:

Yeah for sure, and that's the whole point of the internal work. First you got to put the caring in the right place, and if the caring in that moment is I need the money, the client is going to feel that Both can be true.

Speaker 2:

You can exist in a space where you need the money, but if in that moment you're there for the service of the client, they'll be more likely to have the money, and so it's okay, if you need the money, feel those feelings, leave it outside the door for a minute and come clean and clear to serve, and then, if the service matches up, the offer matches, the fit matches, the invitation is accepted, the money will be there on the back end of the call.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, I love it. I think it's a great. You should probably write one post a week where you talk about that.

Speaker 2:

I think a lot of For you.

Speaker 1:

No, no, no, I've got it, I have the notes and it's right here, but not everybody does.

Speaker 2:

No, thank you, I take your feedback.

Speaker 1:

So another thing you do, speaking about your post, you do every once in a while you will write it.

Speaker 1:

You did it I think it was today, but you've done it in the past where you write these really like encouraging posts, just like you see the business owners out there, you see the entrepreneurs, you, you align with them, you empathize with them, like you know how big of a struggle it is, how challenging it is, the emotional, just all of it, and so you write these like really I really love reading them.

Speaker 1:

I don't see a lot of them out there. So I really appreciate it when you do that and I hope other people that see it and read it do too, because I really it means a lot when I see it, because I, because you've been in it for a while and so you you know, you know what it's like you're really speaking from like a lot of experience, and so for somebody new like me that reads that like it always makes me feel kind of seen and appreciated, which is not I mean, you don't really see that otherwise. Right, like nobody's really telling you like hey, I know you're really working hard and you're new and stuff Like good job, right, that just doesn't, it's not like a common thing. So I think when you do that-?

Speaker 2:

No, that's one of the things you give up when you leave the corporate structure. Is that feedback monitor? The only feedback you have is whether you're selling or not, and that's part of the drama. But yes, when I write those posts, I'm thinking of all the people that I've served and that experience, that collective experience of witnessing them go through the beginning phases and the struggles my own experience. I think about what would I have needed to hear in the beginning of my journey, what would I have preferred to receive on LinkedIn and how can I serve more people? Same thing.

Speaker 1:

No, I love it. So I want to switch gears again. I want to hear how we touched on a little bit earlier with your family life and then running the business and writing books and time on LinkedIn, and then your own personal wellbeing and like everything that kind of goes in to your life. How do you manage to like take care of yourself and prioritize your own, like physical and mental health, while also taking care of your kids and then being a partner and like everything that goes into the business Like? How do you like, how do you structure your days, weeks, months to make sure that everything is getting taken care of?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, sometimes it's a challenge, that's for sure.

Speaker 2:

Some of the key ingredients are agreements, boundaries, commitment that urgency comes back into play Support. I have a phenomenal partner. My husband is incredible and helpful and we partner in all things for making this ship continuing to move forward. But that commitment in the morning, every single morning, to say to myself what do I need today to be of greatest service to all of these moving parts, my kids and my family, and my husband first, but also all the business owners that I serve, and then extending out into the LinkedIn community. There's like these spheres of influence. And so I always start with, you know, I, I'm the center of my own world. Right, I know I'm not the center of anyone else's, but I, I have to put my oxygen mask on first in order for all of these rings and spheres and plates spinning in the air to continue to go.

Speaker 2:

So I ask myself every morning what do I need today? What physical wellness do I need? What emotional wellness, thought wellness, what spiritual wellness do I need in this moment? Is it an aggressive workout, a run like really pushing myself? Is it yoga? Is it meditation? Is it Reiki? What do I need to put my own oxygen mask on so that I can deliver to all of these moving parts of life, and being super present is another ingredient of success.

Speaker 2:

Like you said, we do need to think about the future and we need to plan for the future and vision for the future.

Speaker 2:

It's all healthy stuff, and we do need to incorporate what we've already been through in the past, but the only time zone that's really real is right here and right now.

Speaker 2:

So, trying to stay as present as possible, I don't have many issues. I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't really need people holding me accountable. When I say I'm going to do something, I do it, maybe even do a fault at times, and so that's one thing that has really allowed me to be able to run my calendar between all of the kids and the sports and the business owner needs. I'm pretty strong with my boundaries and my agreements between the different relationships that I have about when I'm available. When I'm not, and that doesn't just apply to logistically how I structure my day, it's also internally. I'm not thinking about that right now. That's not on the docket, because I'm here with my kids right now, and I want to be present to them right now because that's not on the docket, because I'm here with my kids right now and I want to be present to them right now because that's where we are.

Speaker 2:

And so it's both internal and external boundaries. It's conversations, those agreements that come through with clients when someone gets an ex. Today, one of my clients called me and they had something going on in their business and they asked for 10 minutes of my time. That was outside of our normal time and they're so grateful when I give that to them. But they don't take advantage because we have agreements that we both respect each other, and so really making sure that I'm sticking to the plan, sticking to the times that I set aside, and having honest, open conversations when things are maybe falling out of the boundary those are all really important ingredients for success in that balancing all the moving parts.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, it's a lot, Um, it's, it's you're doing, you're doing a lot. So I, uh, I commend you for, for everything that you're doing, and especially with, especially with young kids, like it's not easy. Uh, they require they require a lot of attention, they require a lot of energy, they require a lot of money. It's a lot.

Speaker 2:

They do. I'll be about D. I'll be about so no.

Speaker 1:

So I mean, it does get a little bit easier as they get older, but then the needs change and shift, but they don't need quite as much of your. My kids are a little bit older now and so, like I don't, they don't need me all the time the way they did when they were, when they were little. So, um, so it's it's, it's a lot. So I, I applaud everything that you're doing.

Speaker 1:

Um, and I know, I know it's not easy and and your days are your days are very full and very busy. Um, so it kind of leads me as we kind of wrap up here and I wrote a post on this a while ago about, like the different masks that we wear, and that's kind of was the impetus to start the podcast, because you know I used to wear a lot of masks. You know, my parents divorced when I was young and so I was different around my mom than I was around my dad, around his family and my mom's family and my friends. And then at school and as I got older, at work, right, I was always juggling, like I was never like my true self for the most part in any of those situations. I always kind of varied it. And then now, as I've gotten older, I've dropped a few of the masks, but there's still like different ones.

Speaker 1:

Um, and I I wrote in the post like I think our goal in life as we evolve, ideally, is like we get to the point where we're just hopefully not wearing any, but we're wearing like very few, so we can just kind of be ourselves in any social, professional, whatever situation. So I'd love to get your thoughts on that, like as we mature in age and can we get closer to that kind of truest version you know of ourselves?

Speaker 2:

I love that you wrote a post about that and I absolutely agree that I mean it's, in some ways, self-preservation and protection, and, depending on what we've been through in our experiences in life, sometimes those are absolutely necessary, and so I don't think we even need to vilify the masks that we've collected over the years, that they came to us for a reason, and it's more, as I said, it's about integrating all those different parts of who we are into the newer version of who we're becoming. It's not that we necessarily need to change, although sometimes that is the call. If that's what you choose. One of the masks that I wore that I continue to struggle with that I wrote about in the book too is the mask of perfection, that front stage. The book, too is the mask of perfection, that front stage.

Speaker 2:

Have it all together kind of mentality is something that I have strived for for my whole life, and so this new version that I'm beginning to play with, and experience of being vulnerable about some of the parts that maybe I don't have it all together, or being able to share some of the things that maybe I don't have it all together, or being able to share some of the things that I've been through that are not ideal.

Speaker 2:

That is equally as terrifying as it is gratifying, because vulnerability creates credibility. That aside, it creates connection, that people don't need the perfect buttoned up version of us, they need the real version of us. Don't need the perfect buttoned up version of us, they need the real version of us. So I'm learning that more deeply and more deeply. And, yes, it does come with a maturity. Over time it does, it hones, it shifts and changes. So I'm guessing the masks kind of change shape as you grow and sometimes you put one down completely and you no longer need it anymore, and sometimes you integrate it into this new version of you and it can take a lifetime, but that's okay.

Speaker 1:

No, I love that, and the vulnerability part is like it is a challenge, right, because I think it's a line where you don't want to overshare, but you want to share enough that you're representing who you are, like values, lived experience, thoughts, ideas. And so I think that's a struggle a lot of people have with, especially on social media platforms is you want to tell stories that nobody else can tell, right, because no one else has gone through what you've gone through. But then I think people struggle with like well then, how much is too much and how much is too personal. I think people struggle with like well then, how much is too much and how much is too personal, and I do like that.

Speaker 1:

I think LinkedIn is getting a little. It's not Facebook territory, which hopefully it never gets to, but people are sharing openly about past trauma or just negative experiences, like in their lives, whether it's personal or in the workplace, because I think they start to understand, like kind of like you, like other people have probably experienced this or something similar, and then we can. It helps, it's like therapeutic right To get it out there and talk about it. And then when other people are like, yep, that happened to me or or whatever. Then you know it starts to create that bond and then you can build that community and in that shared experience. So I think it's important.

Speaker 2:

And I'm glad to hear you talk about that and I'm glad that I see kind of this. That's why the book was writing process was so transformational. Is it's just this heart opener? It's this this cracking open of who you are so that you can come out from from behind the scenes and come out from hiding and people see you and they receive your story. And if it's meant to connect with them, great. If it doesn't, great. But. But either way, you are now seen and it's liberating to be able to be seen and come out from hiding.

Speaker 1:

I love that, I think it's great and I hope more people do that, that you realize. I think it's easier as you get older, because I think you start to care a little bit less about what other people think At least I do, you know versus even 10 years ago, sharing stories and things about my life and pictures of myself even would have felt very uncomfortable and like I'm not going to do that, uh, but now, like I don't, it just doesn't really bother me, right, like it's, like nobody's paying that much attention anyway, um, so I'm just going to do it and I think that faster you can kind of get to that point. You get more comfortable and more confident. You know in who you are, um, and it just becomes, you know, becomes easier and, um, then you start to realize people you know resonate with your message and then, like you said, that feels good but then in turn helps them and then it's like this you're kind of paying it forward.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's like the recipe for success in business is being authentically who you are, and that's going to require peeling back some layers.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's the whole point Well, this has been great. I so appreciate your time and your honesty and your insight, really, truly grateful for it. Before we go, you can talk about how people can find you whether it's your business, your book, linkedin but if they're looking to get in touch with you or hear more, about you.

Speaker 2:

How would they do that? Yeah, well, hopefully you'll have show notes, because spelling in my name will be your greatest challenge. You can find me on pretty much all outlets. I'm on Instagram, facebook and LinkedIn. Linkedin is my primary, if you haven't noticed at this point in our conversation, and all at rayannlacatinacom, or rayannlacatina for the tag. So if you're interested in learning more about coaching, you can find information online at rayannlacatinacom. If you want to take that quiz, it's com slash energy quiz. And if you want to connect on any of the socials, we're out there and we can find each other.

Speaker 1:

Love it Awesome. Well, this is great Again. Thank you so much for your time and appreciate you coming on.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much.